Transportasi

Who jumps out of moving vehicles? Pretty much every bad ass to ever be created by Hollywood: Indiana Jones, James Bond, Batman… oh, and ME.

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Twenty cents is a small fee to pay for the exhilarating feeling of bad assery that I feel when I take the bus in Indonesia. Not only does it feel like I just walked into a Lucas Film scene and you expect to hear good old Indie’s whip crack  on the roof above as he fights a villain that encompasses an abundance traits best described as racially insensitive. But, if you’re really lucky, and the driver decides not to come to a complete stop, you get to fulfill your life in a small, yet very meaningful way and hop right off that mother busser. The speed of the bus is irrelevant to the fact that you’re joining the ranks of Indiana Jones, and James Bond, throwing caution into the wind and jumping off  rickety, loudly colored public transportation in a foreign country.

Tips for taking an Indonesian public bus like a bad ass:

1. Flag down the bus with one finger (common practice and it looks classy)

2. Have your cash money ready for the driver: 2000 rupiah

3. Be aware of your belongings because Indiana Jones isn’t here to defend you against pickpockets.

4. Try not to break form by smiling and waving at all the cute children staring at you. You must remember you are on this bus because you are one hard not to be messed with individual about to do something a little crazy.

5. Be ready for gas station stops that take 20 minutes

because for some reason all the buses seem to need gas at the same time so you’ll be in a line of 3 or 4 buses all filling up on 9000 rupiah($0.90) per liter gas.

6. Bang on any hard surface (side of the bus, door, seat in front of you etc.) about 30 seconds before you want to stop.

7. Hop off that moving bus and feel the adrenaline surge. You should receive your certificate welcoming you into the official ranks of daring bad asses in 3 to 5 weeks.

You’re welcome.

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